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[ dynamite ]

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19 picked themselves up | f a l l
Bah, lame. [29 Apr 2005|03:21pm]
[ mood | blank ]

All entries from here on in are friends only. If you're one of my few friends without an LJ...GET WITH THE ANGSTY TEENAGE TIMES! Jeez.

And sorry, but most of my LJ friends are IRL, so if I've never talked to you before, I probably won't add you. It's nothing personal, but thanks for your interest : )


4 picked themselves up | f a l l
[03 Apr 2005|10:47pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

I realized today that I've basically pissed away my break. Here is what I should have done:

- Arts High work
- studying for pre-calc makeup stuff
- reading
- writing
- mailed stuff to publishers for Arts High
- playing bass
- Album of the Week

Here's what I did instead:
- slept
- worked
- hung out with friends/Matty
- Internet
- slept
- gained 5409850923845 pounds stuffing my face pitifully this weekend.

Thus, nothing to show Joe, publishers, no clean room, no madd bass skillz, and no album of the week.

What the fuck. Can I hit the rewind button please?

19 picked themselves up | f a l l
Dated March 31, 2005 [02 Apr 2005|12:44am]
[ mood | crushed ]

"Dear Maggie:

The admission committee has met and I am sorry to inform you that we were not able to admit you to Princeton this year. We received a record applicant pool of 16,500 applications and were able to admit only a small percentage of that pool for an entering class of 1,220 students.

We realize you may be disappointed with this decision. We could not admit all the qualified students who applied to Princeton in this admissions cycle. Our choices reflect the strength and size of our applicant pool, and they are not judgments on any student's potential as a college student.

The admissions committee made each decision in the context of the other applications and therefore, we cannot provide specific reasons why certain students were not offered admission. The enclosed 'Statement to Candidates' gives an overview of the process. We know this explanation may not be consoling, but it is as much as can be practically given.

The committee appreciated the time, care, and effort you put into your application. We wish you well as you pursue your education.

Janet Lavin Rapelye
Dean of Admission"

f a l l
Boo : ( [01 Apr 2005|12:25pm]
[ mood | nervous ]

Last day of Spring Break. I'd say it's been productive. I got a prom dress. So did Jocey and Katie. I didn't see Katie's but Jocey's is super pretty (and I'm sure Katie's is too, because I doubt she'd buy an ugly prom dress :P). I can't promise that I WON'T be distracted the whole time by the sequin-y things on them. They're pretty o.o;; Am I a bad person for being excited about this event?

And I think I get my Princeton decision today. This makes me nervous. Matty was speculating that they should tell people they were accepted, and then put "APRIL FOOL'S!" in huge letters at the bottom. And then I died a little bit :P

On the roster for today includes...productive things, because sitting around on the computer is...bad news for the eyes. Yes.

5 picked themselves up | f a l l
I am written on the subway walls. I am bitter when I fall. [30 Mar 2005|10:37pm]
[ mood | awake ]

As speculated, I posted an Album of the Week in my blogger and I've already started to write the next one.

And: Interesting Devdas speculation.

f a l l
[27 Mar 2005|10:21pm]
[ mood | blank ]

Easter was not nearly as awful as it could have been.

But it's still awful.

This is floating all over MyspaceCollapse )

Maggie J, over and out.

1 picked themselves up | f a l l
[23 Mar 2005|03:07pm]
[ mood | Thinking, but useless. ]

60 school days left until graduation! Jesus Christ! I could almost die. Almost.

I'm considering signing up for the volunteer rescue squad (mostly because I hate that as of now I'm just kind of sitting around and taking up air), but I'm totally inept and retarded, so I'm not sure that's a great idea. I love the idea of it, but I really don't know how well I'd be able to handle old people on the brink of death, maneuvering traffic accident victims from car wrecks, and other horrid things.

Things for me to think about while my computer implodes, I guess.

10 picked themselves up | f a l l
[22 Mar 2005|10:43pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

Well, I'm reformatting this little slut of a computer because it went and infected itself with the Blaster Worm (the technological equivalent of AIDS). Yummy. All I know is that I got a delightful little popup several times yesterday counting down from 45 seconds and telling me that when the timer hits zero, the computer shuts off. And to my surprise, it did. Excellent!

I've backed up almost all the important stuff and sometime soon I plan on backing up all my photos by sending them to myself to fill up this totally superfluous e-mail space and borrowing some of Jocelyn's webspace. I even downloaded an FTP client, so I must be serious.

I just have a feeling that it'll be like packing for a long trip: I'll forget something REALLY important and be totally screwed. That would really, really suck.

I saw Bride and Prejudice today with Jocelyn and it was hella fun. The movie wasn't meant to be a deep Bollywood film, guys... get over it. It's meant to a) increase tourism to India (it sold me on the idea!) and b) up the potential of getting crackas interested in Bollywood by handing them a watered-down, light-hearted plot, music in English, and Aishwarya Rai, who happens to be the prettiest woman on the face of the planet.

It did its job and it made me giggle, especially when they played Nelly...in an "Indian" movie. What?

But the music is not so great... so I came home and listened to my Devdas soundtrack.

14 picked themselves up | f a l l
[20 Mar 2005|12:28am]
[ mood | calm ]

I was exactly right. I am just as easy to forget as I thought I was, but this comes as no real surprise to me. Whatever, I hope you're happy in the life you've made for yourself, because you're clearly not the person I thought you were.

In other news, I woke up on Friday and all the strange sadness and hostility I've had balled up in me for what feels like forever was just...gone. I don't know what I did or how I got rid of it, but I woke up feeling peaceful, satisfied with myself, and ready to face the world with patience and pacifism. Truly Gandhian, only less smart than I should be and with a little less conviction. I've spent my entire senior year being pissed off at the people who probably deserve it the least because it would only bring them satisfaction if they knew the half of what I went through for them. So, it's out. It's gone. And it feels great.

Look out, world.

f a l l
[19 Mar 2005|02:44pm]
[ mood | Whatev ]

Band practice: Yay!
Going back to school on Friday: Boo!

Vernal equinox tomorrow morning: Yay!
I still live in NJ so it won't be warm for another month: Boo!

Getting roughly 6,000 dollars in financial aid from UConn: Yay!
Still no word from Princeton: Boo!

Chocolate-fudgey-goodness brownie from Shoprite: Yay!
No pizza left in the house: Boo!

Me: I'm going to go listen to Marilyn Manson and shoot up my school.
Courtney D: Shooting up the school, fine. But not Marilyn Manson!

^ This was from Arts High on Tuesday. Yes, if you were wondering, we do rule.

15 picked themselves up | f a l l
This keeps boding worse and worse. [16 Mar 2005|11:42am]
[ mood | amused ]

I stayed home because my tummy has hurt for like 15 hours and I need a mental health day. This week rules. Yesterday: Arts high. Today: off. Tomorrow: Field trip. That makes two full days of school. I really need that, because I hate that goddamn place. Yeah.

So in other amusing news, here's the tracklisting for the new Alkaline Trio album:

1) Time to Waste
2) Poison
3) Bleed
4) Mercy Me
5) Death Bed
6) Stained in Satin
7) Sadie
8) Fall Victim
9) I Was a Prayer
10) Prevent This Tragedy
11) Back to Hell
12) Your Neck
13) Smoke

Also known as 13 tracks of MAN-LOVIN'. Seriously, what the fuck! I really hope all of this is a joke and if it isn't, well, here's an open letter to the band:

Dear Alkaline Trio:
You are not Lacuna Coil.
You do not sacrifice virgins to Satan.
Please note and begin to produce a good album.

Love, Maggie.

Dear Dan Andriano:
Please reunite Tuesday. You know you want to.

Love, Maggie.

10 picked themselves up | f a l l
Tear me up and stuff me down the drain. [15 Mar 2005|09:44pm]
[ mood | cold ]

A few things.

a) this album still rules.
b) I'm considering updating my blogger weekly with some "album of the week" type shit, with music I happen to be feelin' at the moment. I figure that'll keep me from losing touch with Blogger because it makes me feel professional and special *I'm lame*, and it'll help me get motivated enough to obtain new music. Yeah. So, new albums, old albums, whatever. It'll be on there.
c) There is no such thing as a hair product that can revive my tired, stick-straight hair. How tragic.
d) I've been cold, tired, stomach-achey and lonely since I got home and I'm wondering how much of the physical is fabricated by my mind.

It amazes me sometimes how fast people can just pick up and move on, like nothing happened. I've done the same thing and I'm sorry. It never struck me how cruel it is until people that mattered to me very much just lost contact, picked up, and moved on. Did I matter? Ever? Did I make even the smallest imprint?

There are loose ends I should be tying but I'm terrified at the potential it has to be one of the most hurtful processes ever.

28 picked themselves up | f a l l
The moment I've been dreading: [13 Mar 2005|05:44pm]
Matt Skiba: Almost not gay!

So, I got accepted to Syracuse yesterday.

3 picked themselves up | f a l l
[11 Mar 2005|11:35am]
[ mood | amused ]

"Il nome scritto verticalmente nei soggetti."

The name of the album written in the subjects of the Alkaline Trio forum is:


Holy mother of God. It is really, really hard to not laugh right now.

2 picked themselves up | f a l l
the best band ever? Yes, thank you. [10 Mar 2005|12:03pm]
Matty + Jesse + Maggie + ? =


The best band ever in the world.

14 picked themselves up | f a l l
A warm day in Jersey = a cold day in Hell. [07 Mar 2005|08:52pm]
[ mood | tired ]

Today was wonderful because it was finally warm and the light was soft and glowy. It was such a nice feeling to return to stretching out in the amphitheater during my study hall.

Whoever filmed White Oleander loves Southern California as much as I do because the way they filmed the wind blowing through the palm trees struck a part of me that's still lost in the streets of Riverside.

Summer now, please.

13 picked themselves up | f a l l
All of us are done for. [01 Mar 2005|09:48pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]

Whoa guys. My computer has been doing some WEIRD things on a regular basis. I tell my dad, he tells me I should re-format my harddrive and put windows 2000 on it so it'll run better. Has anyone ever heard of downgrading a PC? Jesus Christ. Can't we just bite the fucking bullet and buy a laptop? Ok, whatever, I won't go out for like two years. I didn't need socialization anyway but how am I going to get it through to him that this five-year-old baby is on its way out? Seriously. It's waving to me from the other side of the River Styx at this point. It's hopeless.


And I call this one "emo" [01 Mar 2005|04:06pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Everything I touch turns to shit, even the worlds that are on my shoulders. My everything hurts and I want to go back to bed.

9 picked themselves up | f a l l
Soon we'll all be gone. [27 Feb 2005|07:47pm]
[ mood | nostalgic ]

Okay, well, I think I'm more affected by Blink182 breaking up than I'd like to be. Enema of the State, Dude Ranch and their live album have been in my CD players nonstop since I heard about their "indefinite hiatus."

I guess I'm a little rattled because the more Matthew and I ruminated about bands that changed our lives, the more I realized that Blink182 did that. Yeah, that's ridiculously cheesy, because Blink182 was a bunch of pop-culture whores. But at the time, so was I. So when I put the CD in and found that they sounded like REAL people instead of untouchable, ridiculous celebrities... that had me. And it was a good feeling to connect with music for the first time... ever. I mean, fuck, it's really hard to "connect" with music crooned by a synthesizer (quoth the Simpsons: "thank you, NASA!")

I've had a love-hate relationship with punk (love the music, hate the assholes who love the music, but in a good way) ever since.

So yeah, RIP Blink182. I'm really glad that you'll never have a chance to put out another album like the self-titled one ever again, but thanks for all the albums before then.

13 picked themselves up | f a l l
I'm only putting this here so Matty will put a photo of me in his General Interests. [24 Feb 2005|11:02pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

I got a semi-haircut but you can't really tell.

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